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Comments:
MsG - 2005-01-27 14:41:57
I want to give you a big hug! I am so sorry you feel put down. Sometimes, my husband does something similar. It is his misguided attempt at 'helping' me. Or so he says. It is like he feels the need to make sure I know how crappy I look when I am heavier. Oh, he disguises it sometimes, but the knife is still there. "You know, it doesn't matter what you weigh, you are still gorgeous." Or my favorite, "You are pretty enough to pull it off ." Grr. (((hugs))) Sending *ring phone, ring!* wishes your way!
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Heather - 2005-01-27 17:49:04
I think your husband is just frustrated about other things and needs to vent...he's just choosing the wrong way. Don't get so down on yourself about your weight. I just recently started getting on a weight loss kick in preparation of getting married...I use an email buddy and it helps greatly. Shoot me an email if you ever want to chat about it:)
Heather
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LJ - 2005-01-27 18:24:09
I just back from my very first physical and ... other. You aren't the only one who has to lose weight sister! Let's do it together!?! My husband is the worst for keeping junk food crap around the house. I can resist it only if its not in my cupboards. Bug hugs to you!
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Des - 2005-01-27 18:48:03
Two things to say...First one..I know what it's like not to trust my husband. I know what it means to have someone be moody and almost cruel...but he would NEVER attack my weight. NEVER. A) He loves me how I am regardless. B) he knows that without HIS son, my depression from moving here for HIS job...I'd not be the weight I am now. He understands that the baby was a contributor and the fact that I've been so depressed I've not felt I had the energy to do anything. And here's the deal...He really doesn't care. He thinks I'm beautiful. Love is unconditional or it's nothing. It angers me that he would blame you for his inability to NOT eat chips. That being said...second thing is this. He's stressed out right now. He feels like less than a man. He is incapable of providing for his family and it's making him feel like a failure. He wants you to feel as bad as he does so he's not alone in it. Beyond that, he feels out of control of his life and he control the part of his environment that is you. He doesn't mean to hurt you, i'm sure. He just wants not to feel so powerless. I'm sorry that you feel so bad. But really, disregard what he's saying right now. It's not how he's feeling about YOU that's causing it...it's how he's feeling about HIM.
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Becky - 2005-01-28 07:01:58
Hi Lisa, I wanted to start out by saying that I am sorry for everything that is going wrong right now, I know it may seem to be consuming you but from what I have read through your journal I see you are a very strong woman and you will over come this just as you have over come all of the other things that have happend. As for your husband, I won't put him down because the last thing I want to accomplish with this note is to make you feel defensive, I myself have always struggled with my weight, but in my house the only one who puts me down is me, my husband lives telling me he loves me and I look great. The only thing I can think is that your husband is just frustrated and worried and instead of saying just that he is getting neurotic and hurtful, that is just the way men work sometimes, my father certainly is that way.
As for feeling like he doesnt care enough I have had that same problem with R, but when I ask him about his attitude he just says that he tries to keep his cool because he doesnt want me to freak out, maybe that is what your husband is doing. Anyway, I hope things get better quick, you deserve some peace.
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